Tips On How To Make The Best Of Your Relationship

By: Claudia Nwankwo

Expensive things are cool et all but you dont need the most expensive things to look good. Likewise for good relationships. A good relationship is much more than luxury, steaming sex and banging body. 

Its more about how you and your partner connects with-in and with-out.

We all need that one person who makes us happy. Who occupies a special spot in our hearts, sees only the good in us and puts our minds at peace.

Love Connection

If you are like many who struggle to understand relationships or are on the verge of giving up on your partner. Then this is for you.

First things first.

Evaluate your relationship. Findout whats working, whats not and do a sumpke arithmetic. Take out the things that break you and improve on the ones that bring you both together. 

See tips on how you can make the best of your relationship:

Start with yourself

What are you doing wrong? What kind of character do you potray that attracts the wrong people. Why do you keep making the wrong choices/decisions? Are you being the original version of you or are you trying to be someone else?

I know about the "fake it till you make it" phrase but its always easier and better to let people see you and accept you for who you really are.

At every point in time, stay true to yourself.

Your partner

There is nobody who is a total write-off. There has to be some good in your partner. I do not mean it in sexual terms but there must be a part of them that has the ability to love and show kindness. Harness it!

So you have chosen this person, you love them et al but you still feel they're not good enough. You need to be a bit more deliberate in how you view them, think of them, talk to/about them.

Stop allowing feelings of misery speak to you about them. The more you talk about something, the more life, you give it power over you.

So knock it off! Knock off the negative thoughts/assumptions/doubts. Instead, find the good in them and start seeing them from that angle. What were those things for which you chose them at first?

Choose to love them instead of condemning them.

Then, Others

Detoxify your relationship of 3rd party influence ( take it out completely if possible). Its you & your partner first before friends, family & even kids.

If you are finding it difficult to differentiate or separate your relationship with other people from you & your partner then you are doing it wrongly. No matter how you look at it, friends are outsiders and should never dictate for your relationship.

Keep work, business, family, friends and any other factor that might interfere or pose a risk to your relationship within limits.

Invest in your relationship

This is the one person out of billons of others in the world that's got your heartbeating in a different way. This person must be special and worth it.

Put in good amount of effort to be the best you can to your partner. Dont just sit around and wait for your relationship to blossom, water it with love and affection.

Respect your partner and make sure that they respect you too. Speak to them with respect!

Let your partner know your deal breakers & when they have done wrong. When they do right, let them know too. Let them know what you think and how you feel about them / their actions.

Be sensitive to your partners needs/feelings but never bottle up your feelings or do not sweep issues under the carpet. Find the right time and atmosphere to let it out to your partner.

Express yourself but do it with love and respect.

Again, its you first!

When you feel like you've given your best and all have failed. When you feel alone as if you are the only one protecting and watering your relationship and your partner keeps giving the wrong vibe.

If you have detoxified your relationship from negative influence and attitude but still find so many cracks in there, done so much to be the best version of you et al. When it feels like love has failed, it may be time to take a break. Set yoirself free from pain and find your own happiness.

If you have compromised so much that it feels like you're loosing yourself, choose you first!

If you are going through a rough phase in your relationship, you need to understand that it is normal to face challenges and understand that  you have to make deliberate effort to sort them and work out your relationship.