Alot has to change about the Igbo culture

Everytime you see comments like...

"Burn your wife's clothes"

"Beat her up"

"She must submit"

"Man chains his wife"

Yen yen yen...

Check the name of the poster. 90% of the times it's an Igbo man.

There's no denying the effort of the "modern day Igbo man" in the fight against these misogynistic tendencies but you see... it's quite a long journey.

A handful of Igbo men enjoy being power drunk.

They enjoy subjugation, anything to keep a woman defeated.

It's hard to think that the most powerful women around here are Igbos yet the most oppressed.

Onitsha, Aba, Tejuosho market, Computer village.....anywhere you find Igbo men in their numbers, they harass women unchallenged and foolishly 'kikiki' away about it.

If it's not madness, I wonder wtf it is.

Some people will say "it's not only Igbo men". Yes! There are foolish men in every tribe and culture but to a large extent, the Igbo culture encourages harmful practices against women which kind of benefits the men.

Women cannot inherit. Women cannot make decisions. A woman loses her husband, she suffers the cultural side-effects of widowhood. Women are at the receiving end of every bad tradition in Igboland.

Alot has to change about the Igbo culture.

Thats how I was always asked to leave the room each time a family meeting was held to resolve issues between me and my ex.

His family and mine seated, him inclusive but I'll be asked to go wait somewhere while they discussed issues that I (personally) raised about the marriage.

My own matter o!

Most times the meetings ended in laughter, merriment and exchange of gifts and then I am told to relax that things will improve.

As my complaints grew and meetings became more frequent, nobody asked my side of the matter, nobody thought it wise that I must be hurting badly.

Oh well... I told "oga" I would walk away and he laughed it off. Azin...(how dare you think you can achieve that) "you are already married and in catholic church nobody grants you a divorce". Oh yea?

I told my parents I was done but they kept telling me how my brideprice was paid in excess and I shouldn't bring disgrace to the family which meant that as long as I was married to this guy, my right to express myself would be completely grounded.

Lol....odiegwu really. 

I looked everyone in the face and said to hell. 

I didnt set out to be a divorcee or a single parent but then any kind of oppression isn't for me.

I hate to hear that it CANNOT be done. Therefore I have to endure. Naaa.

I woke up one morning and decided to take the bull by the horn. If I die, let me die!

I have never regretted that decision.

I laugh when people think it has to be violence or cheating to end a marriage but that wasnt the case for me. I was losing my human right to marriage. 

Better single, happy and free than stay married in bondage.

Do not get it twisted, I am not a preacher of gender equality (I believe that the man is the head) but as a leader, a man must learn to love and nurture his wife. If I cannot at the least have a say in a matter that affects me then it wont concern me at all.

I will pull the damn plug.

To your tent oh! Isreal.

Women empowerment is important and we must be deliberate about it.

We must raise our girls to keep their head and shoulders high. To know better and choose better.

This is not necessarily Igbo men slander but the culture? Maybe...